Thank You Lord for the days of mourning. In these somber times, I sink so deep, the light in me fades and my countenance falls down. But thank You. For to feel the weight of sin that pierced the son on the cross is a confirmation of me being Your child. It is excruciatingly painful, but it is sweet. Sweet because in Your lovingkindness You remind me that men’s transgression betrays the cross, vexes the spirit and curbs the sweet fellowship with the Father. You dont let me linger long in the wiles of sin; almost pleading me to stop hurting myself. You broke my walls down, to the point of helplessness until my soul weeps and is brought down to the deep abyss of loneliness. Until I discover how far I’ve gone behind and how much I need no one but You.. I do deserve Your judgement…but I plead for Your tender mercies.. because I might not be able to take it, even the very point of Your finger.
I will not seek after comfort and soothing to my soul until You deem it deserving for the grace You can pour out. In my affliction, I just ask You to move me to a higher ground of faith in You. If my pains and cries draw me closer to You, it’ll be better than days of laughter and pleasure without You. Father I have nothing to offer, just my love for You because You first loved me. And is loving me still despite the times I fall away from You. Use this broken vessel and accept this broken spirit..For You are my Healer and Redeemer. Blessed be the name of the Lord.
Isaiah 61:7 “For your shame ye shall have double; and for confusion they shall rejoice in their portion: therefore in their land they shall possess the double: everlasting joy shall be unto them.”
chloenuts 